What our children think of us

Piero and Eduardo can be very similar.  One way in which they are similar is that they are not happy-go-lucky people.  They are often what I would consider to be grouchy .   I am certainly not the only one to notice this so I know it is not a frustrated wife/step-mother thing.  One of the things that we are trying to do is improve Piero’s disposition.  None of us want him to be always unhappy and whining about things that he doesn’t get when he wants to get it.  One of the things that Eduardo does to instill a bit of silliness into it is to ask Piero how Papa acts when he is being ‘renegando’.  I put this word into the blog into its original form because that is the word used.  I know what it means but I am not 100% sure what the most accurate English translation is.  I would say it is something like grouchy or being in a bad mood.  When Eduardo asks that,  Piero puts on a silly show of how Eduardo is ‘renegando’.  Last night, Eduardo took it one step further and asked Piero how I acted when I was ‘renegando’.  He looked at me, he looked at Papa and he said, ‘I don’t know.  She isn’t like that.’  I was  happy that he never saw that side of me.  And it is not because I am perfect.  I think generally I am fairly happy-go-lucky but when I am busy wishing the kids away – I mostly try to hide it.  Do the kids really need to know that I just wish – for that one night – that I had it to myself? Not really… they need to be growing up secure that they are loved and wanted.  And being secure does not mean that all is nice with Second Mommy.  Believe me,  I get after them when they are doing something that I don’t approve of.  But apparently,  disciplining and ‘renegando’ are seen as entirely two different things by Piero.

But at the end of the day?  I felt sad that Piero saw that side of his father enough that he was playacting it.  He should be looking at Papa and saying the same thing he says about me.  "He isn’t like that."

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