Not only did I make it to a first date this week… I made it to the second date and arrangements are already made for a third. And like the other first date, this one broke all the rules…
We started the relationship with me declining to get involved with him. Yep. You heard that right. I sent him a polite email saying I wasn’t interested. It wasn’t that he wasn’t cute because believe me… he was CUTE! HOT! SEXY! and that was just in the pictures. The first problem was that he was 29. The second problem was that his profile was written so poorly as to be considered a joke. It just didn’t seem promising.
But several weeks later, he tried again saying he really wanted to go out with me. I decided I had nothing to lose so I was honest and told him why I declined him. He wrote back saying I wouldn’t be disappointed. I had to admire his persistence so I agreed to a first date. After all… what was I going to lose… a couple of hours? So I met him and he hasn’t been off my mind since.
He seems like a real sweetie. He has a wonderfully soft voice that I don’t think I will ever get tired of listening to. He is punctual (sad but this is a turn on). He is thoughtful. He called me when I was at work even though he knew I couldn’t answer just to leave me a voice mail. He even did something as simple as wipe down the table when the glasses left water on it so I wouldn’t get my arm wet.
What more could you want? Sex appeal you say? He has that in spades! He might have been cute in his pictures but he is down right sexy in person.
And to think that I wouldn’t be dating him at all if it wasn’t for his persistence.
And just for the record – I see some bumps in the road… but lets save that for another post. In this post, let’s just revel in the fact that I might have found a nice guy.
If my dating doesn’t pick up soon… it will need to be retitled Summer Non-dating.
Since July 1st I have:
- contacted 35 men
- been contacted by a number of men that I declined
- been contacted by 11 men whose interest I returned
Out of those 35 men I contacted:
- 29 ignored me – including one guy who ignored my chat
- 2 declined their interest
- 1 returned my interest but disappeared when setting up our first meeting
- 1 returned my interest but disappeared after the first date
- 1 returned my interest and is still talking to me
Of the 11 men that contacted me:
- 1 disappeared after 2 emails
- 1 disappeared after 1 IM
- 1 disappeared after an IM and some emails trying to convince me to go to Yahoo to chat
- 2 never responded to my email back
- 1 disappeared after standing me up on our first meeting
- 1 said he would get back to me when he was in town
- 3 of them I am talking to sporadically but I can’t say there is tons of interest on either side probably
- I mutually terminated the relationship with 1 of them
I get that a great number of men that I contact will not be interested in me. I am only moderately surprised by the number of men who ignored my emails as this pretty much correlated to Match.com. If anything, more men ignore the emails of introduction on the free sites. Strangely enough, my first date came about with a letter introduction that broke all the rules and was written in a minute. Amount of effort does not correlate to the pay-off.
But what I find very interesting is the number of men who initiated contact with me and then failed to follow through after I showed interest. I was seriously interested in a few of them and was hopeful we would get to a first date.
I finally did get to a first date and I thought the date went very well. I was interested him and was very happy when we decided to exchange phone numbers near the end of the date. But something must have went wrong after that point and I am not sure what. Was it because I kissed him on the cheek when we said good-bye? Fumbled entering his number in my phone? Said something?
My next possibility had our first IM last night and it seemed to go well. I have his phone number and am planning to call tonight. We shall see how it goes.
So far, it seems that my summer of attempting to date has netted me a single first date. Not good results.